The Treasure Of Trials

I wish I could effectively express to you all the richness that is my life. It is something that I would not have been able to grasp if someone experiencing it had tried to explain it to me before I had been through such tremendous trials myself.

Josh and I pray together most nights before we go to sleep. This often triggers in depth discussions afterward. I will treasure this "pillow talk" always. We've recently discovered that we both have the gift of wisdom and it's astonishing really the magnitude of truth that the two of us communicate to each other during this time when the cares of the day have been laid at the foot of the cross, and we can finally just relax.

God is there.

There is an undeniable sweetness in the peace that is tangible. I wouldn't trade it for anything. It truly passes all human understanding.

Something Josh said has stuck with me for weeks now. There is such wisdom and truth to it that it has taken me that long to really turn it over and over in my mind in order to comprehend it. Even now I feel as though I've received only the most minuscule foretaste of what God has for me to glean from it. I probably won't even come close to saying what he said as effectively as he said it, but I'll try.

"We will only experience richness in Christ while we're in the midst of the greatest trials of life. For it is only then that we can truly appreciate the beauty of all that He is, and what He does for us." He went on to explain that His grace is sufficient only when we are weak, and we fully realize that we cannot do anything without Him. Therefore we glory in the midst of tribulation because we know that nothing takes God by surprise. He is in control of seemingly impossible situations from the perspective of our humanness.

Our lives are a tapestry, and weaved within the trials are the most beautiful threads of life at it's richest. God gives gems of His truth, His wisdom, His justice, and His righteousness that we would neither appreciate, value for their true worth, nor even see without the magnifying effect of troubles. The stress of having a jam packed schedule centered around church is no longer stress, but a joy. Ministries unexpectedly expand and result in the greatest fulfillment. Opportunities for ministry arise that were not available before, and instead of being tempted to shirk them, we jump at the opportunity! God has funny ways of making us willing to do what He requires. It reminds me of the "Hornet" song.

The most mundane tasks of life take on a deeper meaning when you realize that you are not promised one more day to tell or show a loved one how much they mean to you.....

Josh's mom has cancer. Her last appointment was not good. Nevertheless, we all have peace.

The most stressful, nerve racking duties become a joy in light of the magnitude of testifying presumably "against" a loved one in court in the midst of a group of "powerful" people who want nothing more than to destroy your life as you know it.....

For me singing and playing the organ used to make me quake with nerves, as did praying and "ushering" (read confronting people who disrupt the services) for Josh. Now it's a matter of perspective. I say to myself, "At least I'm not on the witness stand" and Josh says, "At least I'm not preaching. Yet. :)" (The Lord has added a new dimension in my full reliance on Him before singing since my voice is raspy and weak the majority of the time now. Quitting is not an option. I have no choice but to give it to God before I get on the platform, and each and every time for the last three months, a small miracle has taken place once Kristy begins to play. Before we probably would have said it was merely a coincidence that my voice was clear the moment I had to sing, and that "it was a good thing" without giving God 100% of the credit. It's as if we were blind and are just now beginning to really "see".)

We see so much now:

~The truth behind the verse where the disciples said they counted it an honor to suffer shame for His name.

~Just the tiniest, yet most wonderful, glimpses of the unfathomable love He has for us mingled with wonder and awe that He would stoop to care for such as we are.

~How beautiful heaven must be. There is a reason to go on.

~The sweetness of trusting and obeying.

~The reward of living a life free from sin being motivated by knowing that God honors the righteous and His ears are open unto their prayers.

~How "in sorrow's dark night, the lamp of God's Word sheds it's beautiful light. And sweet was the voice of the Comforter then, awaking new praises again and again!"

~How His Light shed on our path of darkness turns it instead into one of incomprehensible blessing and peace.

~That His Grace really is sufficient for me:

Many times I'm tried and tested
As I travel day by day.
Oft I meet with pain and sorrow.
And there's trouble in the way;
But I have the sweet assurance
That my soul the Lord will lead,
And in Him there is strength for every need.

For His grace is sufficient for me,
And His love is abundant and free.
And what joy fills my soul, just to know, just to know,
That His grace is sufficient for me.

When the tempter brings confusion,
And I don't know what to do,
On my knees I turn to Jesus
For I know He'll see me through.
When despair is changed to victory,
Every doubt just melts away,
And in Him there is hope for every day.

Demonstrations of "Exceeding Abundantly"~

The Lord has been giving me the desires of my heart before I even realize the need. I was on the west end the other day and I always try to stop at the second hand stores when I'm there. Do you know how hard it is to find dresses of modest length? Nine times out of ten I walk away empty-handed. I found two beautiful dresses for Alia, the exact size I needed and they were both purple. Usually I'm doing good to find a dress let alone one the color I want. The little sweater that came with the one dress was perfectly coordinated to go with the other dress, too! They were both brand new and 50% off. We were thrilled to pieces! :) God is good.

Josh got an amazing raise on Friday which came about in a most unexpected way. Someone got hired on at the refinery in January and they needed to fill more positions so they asked the guy if he knew of people he could recommend. Josh was one of them. Conoco heard of it before Josh even did, and unbeknownst to us got the paperwork done to approve a raise not only for him, but everyone in his office. Still not what he would be making at the refinery but perfect because at Conoco he doesn't have to work shifts. Proof once again that you can't out-give God, and our actions affect those around us as much as they do us. This was all in play four months before the fact! God is good.

We've set out to be a blessing to others at every opportunity, and have instead been overwhelmingly blessed ourselves. Blessings that we otherwise would have undoubtedly missed out on if we weren't right where we need to be when we needed to be there. God is good.

We should have had to replace our washing machine months ago, and it's still running. God is good.

Our computer says repeatedly that the hard drive needs to be replaced, and yet it has been working fine for us. We have set out to get a new one on several occasions and we always leave without one because we don't have peace about the purchase. God is good.

Money has been inexplicably stretching farther than ever under the same budget we've always had except for a $100 increase in living expenses. We were able to set aside $800 after everything was covered with Josh's last check. God is good!

My mom and dad's sentencing is this Thursday, May 1st at 9:00 a.m. I do not believe it is coincidental that it falls on the National Day of Prayer. Please, please remember my mom and dad, and the rest of us who are going through this fiery trial with them, and ask everyone you know to pray, too. God hears. And cares.